I realized recently that my songs that I wrote for years were a form of personal therapy.

I haven’t really picked up my guitar or thought too much about these songs in the last few years. I think I am changing.

I am spending a lot of time with piano and organ.

I think between historical music and contemporary music like Arvo Part and Messiaen my need for music is being filled without making up guitar type songs.

I still think compositionally. I recently spent quite a bit of time with the first movement of Beethoven’s first symphony. Playing through Lizst’s piano transcription and studying the original score.

My recent obsession with Mendelssohn has caused me to think about the whole classical group of composers from Mozart to Beethoven. I am finding Mendelssohn not only fun to play and listen to, I think his aesthetic was closer to my own than many composers.  He seemed to have a bit of a Hindemthian predilection to write music of various levels of coherence and difficulty.

Listening to early Beethoven is always fascinating when its situated in Haydn’s aesthetic. At least it is to me. Ahem.